🍀 Desired Behaviour Vs Default Behaviour - Issue 154
Hi, I am JOE and I write on "Mindful Productivity & Cerebral Happiness". My endeavour is to share life lessons, some thoughts, quotes & links to articles/podcasts/books, I discover during the week.
Hey Friends
In case you missed my LAST EDITION on🍀Know Your 'Unfair Advantage'? - Issue 153, then you can read it here. And if you’ve not subscribed till now and want to become a patron of this newsletter then you can do this before diving into this week’s ‘SUNDAY REATZO’. You can support my work and get a ‘Productivity Planner’ worth $25 ( ₹2,000 ) free.
During the week, I was out for my regular solo trek and noticed a new place to my right on a lower side near a narrow mountain stream. From a significant elevation, I could not figure out clearly what it is all about. As usual common sense prevailed and I zoomed into a Google map to figure out this serene & mysteriously beautiful place deeply nestled in nature’s lap. This serene & mysteriously beautiful place is named ‘Urban Monk Cafe’ and has triggered my curiosity. I packed my usual stuff and decided to spend a day reading and capturing my fleeting thoughts in such a breathtaking environment. Additionally, I must give a Shout-Out to the concept creator of ‘Urban Monk Cafe’ for an amazing selection of books, warm hospitality, delicious food and much-desired privacy.
Having said that, I was thinking about the default behaviour patterns, we all fall into and how we can be turned into desired ones.
In my regular interaction with people, an impromptu reply I hear from them is - a lack of Will Power’. Do you feel the same ..??, because I don't and you have to hear me out before you make a decisive judgement. I do think about ‘willpower’ but a bit differently, so here it goes -
Will Power is a transitory force and it changes with many variables. In its isolated state 'willpower' is just a word.
If you look around, you will find that everyone loses the battle with willpower, it’s only a matter of time. Let me give you a random example - I know guys who had neither smoked nor drank in their life but after joining their favourite jobs, it didn’t take long for them to join the company of others who do. At first, they resisted, but as the days turned into weeks, the grind of saying ‘No’ when everyone else was saying ‘Yes’ wore them down. Decades later, quitting proved nearly impossible when they turned to willpower.
So it is fair to say this - ‘The very same force that encouraged them to start their new habit was preventing them now from stopping it’? And those who did were able to kick their changed habit only when they changed their environment. So my take is -
You have to find a new environment or people, where their default behaviour is the same as your new desired behaviour.
What looks like a discipline is often a carefully created environment to encourage certain behaviours.
What looks like poor choices is often someone trying their best to use willpower to go against their environment.
In my careful observation, I have found that the people with their best default behaviours are typically the ones with the best environment around them. Sometimes it's carefully chosen, and sometimes it's just plain luck. Either way, it’s easier to align yourself with the proper behaviour in the right environment.
Improving your defaults isn’t by willpower but by creating an artificial environment where your desired behaviour becomes the default behaviour. Your environment will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you if you align it with where you want to go.
Joining groups whose defaults are your desires is an effective way to create an artificial environment. For example - if you want to read more, join a book club. If you want to run/ ride more, join a running/riding club. If you want to exercise more, hire a trainer.
My Favourite Method -
One of my simplest ways to win is to always connect the small things I do to the larger thing I hope to accomplish. I believe that ‘most daily actions evaporate but those you build consciously would certainly accumulate’.
You can start by spending or working on something trivial but a life-changing step in the long run. For me, a brief session of self-development cum building a progressive mindset toward a great cause is always a time well spent.
If it has generated an interest then you can explore my these ‘Article’, just click the link below 👇-
1. BREAK YOUR SELF-DEFEATING HABITS
2. HOW TO BUILD DURABLE AND LONG-LASTING HABIT
Take good care & enjoy reading this week's dose of ‘Mindful Productivity & Cerebral Happiness’.
Joe
❤️ 🧠 Stuff, I invested myself during the week🧤🧤
ARTICLE - Why the World Still Needs Trade -The Case for Reimagining & Not Abandoning Globalization _By Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala
📖📚MY ABSORPTIONS OF THE MONTH:-⬇️
The Course of Love __By Alain De Botton
The Unfair Advantage __ By Ash Ali & Hasan Kubba
Obedience to Authority( The Experiment that Challenged Human Nature) __ By Stanley Morgan
The Moral Animal __ By Robert Wright
Tribes __ By Seth Godin
The Maths of Life and Death __ By Kit Yates
The New Birth Order Book __ Dr Kevin Leman
Spare __ By Prince Harry
🧠Book, I’m Currently Reading:-📖📚⬇️
🧠BOOKS ON MY RADAR FOR ABSORPTION IN MAY 2023:-📖📚⬇️
Powerful __By Patty McCord
Good Leaders Ask Great Questions__ By John C Maxwell
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Good write up. Keep it up!
👍'When in Rome, behave like Romans' is an advice in the form of a phrase. But, even without advice also, basis environment, one is going to behave in the same manner as with advice.
The practical example is, the person who is indisciplined in India, but when goes to US, he automatically turns up as a disciplined guy. It's not that the person has changed, it's just that environment has changed....